Tagged: vegan assholes

Dirty Secret

Holy shit, kids. It’s been a while.

I got distracted starting my other blog, Tell Me So, Monroe. It focuses on self betterment, relationships and not letting people piss on the wall instead of in the toilet. Check it out.

There’s another deep, dark, terrible reason that I stopped posting here.

I’m not really being vegan right now.

Oh, the shaaaaaame.

As I mention in my bio here, I drunkenly agreed to veganism a few years ago when the boyfriend and I decided to shack up. Before meeting him, dating a vegan was so far out of the question that you would have been more likely to catch me on a date an unemployed chose your own adventure writer who was 5’3″. I openly despised veganism because every vegan I met was a raging douche. Ranting and raving, judging and snarking. No better than religious zealots or republicans barking about legitimate rape. Of course, I didn’t understand the concept fully at the time. I just knew that I was apparently an asshole for eating cheese.

Education is key when switching to a vegan diet. You can’t give up so much without knowing why you’re doing it. I never met a vegan who could explain why they lived that way without getting smug and superior. I HATE condescension. I will fold my wee little ears and start rapping Salt N’ Peppa in my head while you drone on and on.

The boyfriend is far from calm and is almost always a little superior when it comes to discussing veganism. He’s taken a tremendous amount of shit from people over the years and it’s left his fuse incredibly short. Luckily, we fell in love pretty damn hard and incredibly quick so I had very little time to think about what he was putting in his pie hole when we went to dinner.

Our household now and for as long as we’ve lived together is vegan. We cook only vegan. When my parents come to visit and my mom wants to make vegetarian dishes that include dairy, I don’t tell her no. She would cook nothing but pasta otherwise. I know that for some people that’s a big no-no and it probably pisses off the boyfriend. But it’s not something I want to make a big deal out of.

After two years of struggling with it. I decided to relax. For the sake of my relationship and my sanity. I’m dealing with so many issues in myself. My relationship with food and health is one of many things that I need to work on. When I look at the whole picture though, I get overwhelmed. I need to start with one thing  and work my way down the list.

It’s also a lifestyle change that I need to make for myself, not for the boyfriend. I don’t eat meat ever, yes that includes fish too, mom! But when dining out I’m eating some dairy.

This all goes back to how I wish the vegan community was more supportive of people making changes, however small they might be to start. Instead of shitting on people when they decide to do Meatless Mondays, why not support it and be thrilled that they’re trying. Maybe that will lead to Meatless Tuesday or Meatless Month! Quick trying to force people into making huge changes all at once. If someone is eating vegan 50% of the time or 25% of the time that’s better than nothing at all so quit being such a dick.

I believe in the cause. I believe it’s the right thing to do. I’m sure that the more I learn to cook and the more I learn about healthy eating, the more I will go back into full time veganism.

This blog was started to document my journey. It’s never been about being perfect. It’s about being honest.

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I’m Cranky, God Dammit-Part 1

Okay. I’m feeling ranty. Yes, that’s totally a word.

As a friend pointed out  on the irritating vegans post, vegans get a whole lot more shit than they give. I’ve seen the boyfriend trying to remain calm as his dietary practices were mocked. I’ve also seen him not remain calm. As for me, I haven’t experienced anything terrible yet. But I’m new at this. My grandma repeatedly asks me what I can possibly be eating if it’s not meat and potatoes. But she’s 91, very forgetful and didn’t grow up with Tofutti cream cheese. She’s not being a twat, she’s just genuinely confused.

I’ve asked my friend to write a post about his experiences dealing with taking shit from non-vegans. I’d like to try to see both sides. Vegan or meat eater, you can be an asshole. One doesn’t make you a nicer person. Both sides are handling things in idiotic ways.

Here’s my problem though, generally a non-vegan who gives a vegan shit about their diet is doing it out of ignorance or some deep down feeling of guilt. (This is my theory anyway, mostly based on my feelings from when I ate meat.) Most people have no idea what kind of cruelty and needless violence their diet is party to. Is it completely dumb to NOT research where your food comes from and how it was treated? Yes, duh. But we were all that person at one point. Not many of us were born and raised vegan. Some of us started questioning things young but some didn’t start until later in life. Even at 60 it’s not too late to start researching and looking at the facts. The vast majority of people making bacon jokes to you don’t actually want to go field goal kick a piglet and then shoot it in the head.

Gah, too many arguments in my head.

Okay, but vegans who are outright angry and aggressive to meat eaters are coming from a place of anger. They’re sick of people questioning their morals. They’re sick of being made fun of for choices that they know are smart. I get that. But what are you helping when you use anger to get people to understand why what you’re doing is so important? Using anger in arguments with ignorant people is not helpful.

Just to remind you:

ig·no·rant/ˈignərənt/

Adjective:
  1. Lacking knowledge or awareness in general; uneducated or unsophisticated.
  2. Lacking knowledge, information, or awareness about something in particular: “ignorant of astronomy
Not stupid. Ignorant.

I thought about taking down the irritating vegan post because I feel like I’ll probably change my tune later on. But this blog is about the journey (oh god, I want to slap myself right now), so it would be dishonest to not write how I feel right now. And how I feel RIGHT NOW is that YOU ARE ALL ASSHOLES. I don’t care what you eat, you’re assholes. Stop fighting. Stop being angry. *

*Don’t stop being angry about the practices in factory farms, don’t stop being angry about the shit going into our food. Just stop getting angry at the wrong people. Put your energy in more useful places.

 

10 Things That Make Vegans Annoying*

1. As I mentioned in my previous post STFU. Most people do not give a shit.

2. Vegan policing other people. “That Monster energy drink isn’t vegan, bro!”

3. Not allowing your friends to eat what they want at a bbq. This is highly contested but I’m sorry, if it’s on a separate grill, it’s not my job to tell you what to eat. If you feel the need to tell your friends what they should eat at bbqs, perhaps you should only have vegan friends and save yourself the trouble.

4. Forcing an entire group of non-vegans to go to a vegan restaurant for you and your needs. Unless it’s your birthday.

5. Trying to out vegan other vegans, another form of policing. “Smoking isn’t vegan, just so you know.” Eat. A. Dick. Oh wait…is that vegan?

6. Filling your FB page with upsetting images of animals being slaughtered. The only thing that does is make people block your feed. Ya can’t force the info on people.

7. Insisting that vegan cheese is good. It’s not. It’s just not. Melted Daiya is the closest we’ll ever get. Stop telling your cheese eating friends that soy cheese is yums. It’s a lie.

 

8. Have I mentioned that you should shut the fuck up?

9. Reciting grotesque facts about factory farms while your friend is eating a chicken sandwich. Dick move, yo.

10. Don’t be this girl:

Sure, she has some valid points. But she’s also a raging asshole. No one is going to be shamed into a  lifestyle like this. What a self righteous twat. I’m willing to bet that more than a few people went out and had steak after watching that video just to spite that broad.

Google “annoying vegan”. Vegans are perhaps one of the most easily mocked groups. You can mock them because it’s not racist or sexist. No one is going to think you’re an evil person for shitting on a foaming at the mouth plant eater.

Point being? You’re hurting the cause more than helping it when you preach on and on like a deranged minister. Shush your little mouth. Here, I have some bomb mac and “cheese” for you, shove that in there.

*I may or may not be guilty of several of these things. I’m working on it!!